Speechless

Have u ever had that feeling,
When u really like some1 and they really like u too and u start to shake and tear up... Speechless cuz ur happy
Basically,
Someone had the courage to find my heart that was hidden under the sea and unlocked my chest and put the pieces back together
and the happy part is that I didn't have to try and gave him hints, he figured it out on his own
Speechless, because there is somebody that
can understand me,
wants only me,
cares about how I feel,
wants to get to be with me,
makes me happy and smile...

Speechless
straight up
there's still L.O.V.E in my life

He Could Be

The difference about this one is that he really, really likes me.
My friend said that when you meet someone as nice as he is, you don't let that go
The thing is that I wasn't looking, it happened naturally
I believe it was his mixtapes, but it was more than that
everything was real
I've talked to many guys, either too far(long distance relationship), clingy, ghetto, not educated, or scrub guys
But with this one, he's here
Imma call this one, Fly boy
he's actually proving to me that he is different from all them other guys
As far as I know now, he is treating me with respect, like a real woman, treats me right
He makes me feel special, not in a retarded way, but like I'm an important part of his life
He's a real gentlemen, very sexy
He gives me my space, doesn't bother me... He knows the right things to say
Do I believe him, sometimes I do, and sometimes it's hard
Do I want to fall for him, I think I am starting to
He is showing me what Love is
I thought my heart, my love was gone
But he found it, it's just a matter of time
that he could be the one to open it

Caught UP!

Am I caught up in the dream world,
or is this happening?
This new Love
New feelings
something is happening whether I want it or not, whether I like it or not

Do I want to be caught up in this thing called, Love?
I do, but then I don't...
I'm still afraid to let love in
questions running through my mind-- is this world, this love just a fling? or is it for realz? what if he wants to be more than just friends, is he the one?
I don't want to be caught up in a relationship, when I don't know what is going to happen? Will he always make me happy-will he treat you right forever- will there be sex involve in this Love?
I don't want to be caught up in any thing, cuz I'm scared.

BUT

when you know and understand each others' point of view,
when you know how to finish each others' sentences,
when you know what's on their mind,
when your heart beats together with his,
when he treats you right way,
that is Love

I can't help it, when Love is catching up with me.

Caught up, in Love
I'm not in the dream world,
it's for realz

Judgementals

we listen to the criticism, the judgments...you change for the better, you prioritize, you do what is best for you-financially, socially, educationally, emotionally...just to make people happy, because it's the right thing to do...right?

What about what makes me happy?

I guess when people are happy is when you I will be happy...right?

No...

I sometimes do not want to listen to what people say about me or the other person,
it breaks my heart to know,
it makes me cry,
trying to live life,
to love, what ever is left of me

Who are you to judge who I date or who I talk to?
Why do you criticize or be judgmental about the person you don't even know...
If you are with an older, who you say is older and been through it all and has more history than a guy your age or younger... what is that say... 80% he knows how to treat a girl wrong, because he's been there and done already...
That's you, not me

I want to be with someone who actually hasn't experienced all that... BRAND NEW...
We don't know what's going to happen in the end...
If he is the guy that will make me happy in the end then he's the one...

We all say, "Guys are always nice in the beginning, but you never know how they are until you are actually with them." and if it's an older man, he might already have a criminal record, you never know, and if it's a your age or younger guy, there is no history; only a little...

We don't know how it's going to be in the future... and I don't want to know what the future will hold... I learned from my mistakes not to think about the future

I live my life one day at a time
I KEEP MOVING FORWARD

Stereotypes

We all have our list on how our men should look like...

...blah blah blah...

we judge before we actually know the person,
we stereotype them in categories that we make up
categories of what type of men they are
Types and classes they belong too...
Are they ghetto, are they trying too hard to fit in, that guys act the way they do-types,
they way they dress (what brand or type of clothes they wear), the way they talk (do they talk like girls, their tone of voice), the way they walk; all leads to the perceptions of who they are...
Their characters show a lot about them...

NOW...
Ask me if I care about these stereotypes of different types of men...
NO!
I don't care,
Who should decide what your future will be...who decide whose best for me?? ME! right?
Do I look for a typical guy... like I said what if he's the one and you let him go, because of the way other people stereotype a guy

Why do people judge other people just because how they are raise?
It's hurts to know how people portray other people because of who they are and what they look like.

I just want a guy, beyond the stereotypes, that will makes me happy.

Afraid

Afraid of love

Afraid to let love in
They may try to take the risk and do the unthinkable,
but not me
I can't do it, not that I don't want to, I just don't know how
cuz
I've been through it all,
even though I was with one person this pass several years,
a lot happened that 21 questions doesn't even compare

They might not worry, cuz they are guys
I worry, I worry about my heart
My heart is glued back together, cuz some1 makes me happy
but

Afraid that some1 will knock it down and break it again

Afraid to take a leap and jump and no1 is there to catch me
Afraid to go through it all over again
Afraid that a boy might just happen to really like me

Afraid to love

Aaliyah - One In A Million